Reprinted from: peacevalleyhouse

There are various types of meditation techniques that fall under two broad categories: concentrative meditation and non-concentrative meditation. Let’s take a further look into the world of meditation.

Meditation is a safe and simple way to balance one’s physical, emotional and mental well being. There are many different types of meditation techniques that one can try out.

Nowadays, more doctors are recommending meditation as a way to relieve insomnia and anxiety, lower blood pressure, help asthmatic patients breathe easier and generally relax the body.

Although there are many types of meditation that are derived from Hinduism, Buddhism or even Taoism and other origins, they all focus on quieting the mind. Its intention is not to remove stimulation but to direct one’s concentration to a healing element. When the mind is filled with the feelings of peacefulness, it cannot take off on its own and start to worry, feel stressed or depressed.

There are three underlying principles of meditation:
1.     In order for us to concentrate, we need to focus on one object at a time.
2.     As soon as our thoughts start to wander, we must slowly bring them back to our focus object.
3.      During meditation, we must try to ignore all sorts of distractions, irrelevant thoughts and sensations that our bodies feel.

There are hundreds of meditation techniques available, many of which have evolved into newer ones over the years. For starters, here are some types of meditation methods that you can try out:

1. Mindfulness meditation

types of meditationThis is a practice, which the Buddhists call vipassanna or insight meditation. Mindfulness meditation is about focusing on what is happening around you and being aware of your thoughts and feelings during the process of meditating. Your mind should be open to your true feelings – there should be no judging of your thoughts. This is a common practice that Buddhist monks use as a way of self-awakening. One can start by watching your breath, then move your attention to the thoughts in your mind and even the sounds and sights surrounding you. The key thing is not to analyse or judge anything.

2. Breath watching

As the name suggests, this type of meditation method is about watching and being aware of your breath during meditating. Start by staying in a comfortable position and close your eyes and pay attention to your breathing. Breathing slowly through your nose will work your diaphragm and allows oxygen to the bottom of your lungs. As your mind wanders, re-focus on the air going in and out of your nose and throughout your body. Find out more about breathing meditation, an interesting and popular type of meditation among many.

3. Walking meditation

This technique involves your body. You can meditate while walking down the street, pacing around the house or even during a run. As your mind starts to wander, concentrate on the movement of body parts and your breathing. Pay attention to the feeling of your feet as it touches the ground.

4. Empty mind meditation

This type of meditation requires you to “empty” all your thoughts from your mind and allow it to rest, and allow a sense of peacefulness to take over. You will need to sit in a cross-legged position in a quiet room so that there are no distractions. Ensure that you are sitting with your spine erect.

5. Transcendental meditation

Meditatation transcendental involves the continuous chanting of a mantra, until a dream-like state of mind is attained. This is useful for those who are easily distracted as chanting a mantra will prevent your mind from wandering. If you are meditating alone, you may use any word or phrase that works for you. You can either repeat it aloud or in your head. In some traditions, an experienced master will choose a phrase or word for you, such as “shanti”, which means peace.

Now that you have understood the basics of several types of meditation methods, you may start practicing the one, which you feel most comfortable with.

Technorati Tags: Anapanasati, Attention, Breathing, Buddhism, Hinduism, Meditation, Mindfulness, Taoism

Reprinted from: Philosophy Matters

By: JJ SYLVIA IV, Publisher in Philosophy Matters

1. Stay healthier
2. Sharpen mental focus
3. Gain more power over your emotions
4. Improved concentration
5. Less bothered by little things
6. Knowledge of self
7. Leave all your worries behind with a daily mental vacation
8. Calms down your restless thinking
9. Frees your mind from negative thinking
10. Understand things faster
11. Become more patient
12. Become more tolerant
13. Become more considerate
14. Increase your inner strength
15. Understand who you really are
16. Reduce stress
17. Decrease muscle tension
18. Reduce anxiety
19. Enhances energy
20. Builds Confidence
21. Helps living in the present moment
22. Develop will power
23. Relaxation
24. Helps with weight loss
25. Helps with healing
26. Increases creativity
27. Develops intuition
28. Increased job satisfaction
29. Helps keep things in perspective
30. Improved memory
31. Increased empathy
32. Easier to quit bad habits
33. Able to see the bigger picture

Technorati Tags: Alternative, Audio and Video, Health, Individualized Instruction, Meditation, Mind, Shopping, stress

Reprinted form: Complete Self Improvement 

Sometimes you can’t avoid feeling down. There may be times that you lose confidence in yourself. With the dozens of problems that you carry on your shoulders, you sometimes feel so low. Unhealthy as this mentality may be, there really are a lot of people who develop a low self-esteem.

But why do some people have low confidence in themselves? What causes someone to have low self-esteem? Sources explain that events like failure, rejection, loss of money, criticism of others, and other negativities lower a person’s self-esteem.

The problem with having low self confidence is that it can go downhill. The moment you have doubt in your abilities, the way you make decisions and act on them is also affected. You will have trouble doing your best, because even before you start on something, you already think you can’t do it well enough. It can be a vicious cycle, actually. Low self-esteem leads to poor performance, thus leading to failure. Failure further reinforces that feeling of being inadequate, and having low self-esteem.

So what causes your low self-esteem? Is it your health? Is it the stress you experience? Are the problems you face leading you to lose confidence in your abilities? Wake up and smell the coffee – maybe you need a self-esteem boost, pronto!

Interestingly enough, there is a way for problems to cause a person’s self-esteem to turn around and even improve! An Ohio State University 2011 survey found that the youth of today get a morale boost when they find out that they have debts. Self-esteem improves because these youngsters believe that they are in control of their lives.

A key trick here is to stop being negative and start delving towards the positive. It may seem hard at first, but you will find that when you have a brighter outlook in life, things will go uphill instead of downhill. After all, when you’re down, there is no place to go but up. Put this in the context of your self-esteem – improve on your personal views and you will see things in a new light.

One way for you to remedy your low self-esteem is to talk to someone. Have that close friend or loved one help you evaluate on what’s making you feel low. Sometimes, hearing encouraging words from someone close to you is enough fuel to get you going. More often than not, people just need to be heard and to feel appreciated. If this is the case with you, then learn to open up – you will feel much better after doing so.

Having low self-esteem doesn’t have to be a hopeless situation. Remember, only you can turn that frown upside-down. Give yourself a confidence boost, and be more positive about yourself. From there, how you see yourself and how you relate with others will improve as well.

Incoming self improvement search terms:

• low self esteem
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• self-esteem
• people with low self esteem
• self confidence
• low self-esteem
• why do some people have low self esteem
• low self confidence
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• low self IMAGE

Technorati Tags: Blog, Child, Health, Mental Health, Self Esteem, self help, The Ex (band), Wikipedia

Reprinted from: Psych Your Mind

By: Anna Luerssen,publisher in Psych Your Mind

In my last post I described a manipulation that was successful in boosting low self-esteem.Denise Marigold and colleagues directed participants to think less about the details of a partner’s compliment and more about the significance of the partner’s words. This compliment reframing catalyzed both an improvement in relationship satisfaction for individuals with low self-esteem, and an increase in self-esteem itself. Today I’d like to continue this thread with another set of successful interventions targeting changes in self-esteem.

Sandra Murray, a professor at the State University of New York – Buffalo, argues that because individuals with low self-esteem see themselves in such a negative light, they often feel inferior to their relationship partners. Given the discrepancy between their self-views (sucky) and their views of their partner (awesome) they often have a hard time 1) understanding why their partner wants to be with them, and 2) believing that their partner is truly committed to them. Murray calls this a state of “felt insecurity,” and has found that it’s associated with self-protective behaviors that eventually undermine relationship functioning (Murray, Holmes, & Collins, 2006).

To change this process, Murray and colleagues (2005) conducted two interventions that tried to reduce feelings of inferiority by pointing to 1) strengths in the self, and 2) flaws in the partner. She believed that “putting the partner within reach” would alleviate rejection concerns, increase felt security, and by extension boost self-esteem. Here’s what she did…

Boosting Self-Esteem – Study 1

In the first study Murray attempted to “put the partner within reach” by increasing the participant’s own positive self-views. Participants completed a bogus personality assessment and were given feedback about their profile. Participants were led to believe that they had a combination of BOTH strengths AND weaknesses that easily fit with many partners and were desired by many people. Participants with low self-esteem responded to the intervention with increased confidence in their partner’s positive regard and long-term commitment to their relationship. In addition, these participants evidenced a boost in self-esteem. Presumably, the intervention alleviated doubts about their interpersonal value, and by extension made them feel like they were on equal footing with their partner after all. Why did feedback increase self-esteem and not backfire like in other studies? The feedback was not over the top. It was believable for participants with low self-esteem, given that it considered both strengths and weaknesses, unlike the “I am lovable” affirmation participants were instructed to complete in the failedpositive affirmation intervention.

Boosting Self-Esteem – Study 2
In the second study Murray attempted to “put the partner within reach” by decreasing the participant’s overly positive views of their partner. Participants completed a survey that ostensibly measured how considerate their partner was. The survey included questions like “Have you ever felt your partner was being selfish” or “Has your partner ever done something he or she really hates just to make you happy.” Subsequently, participants received feedback from the experimenter that their partner was not behaving as considerately as he or she could. The findings, although surprising and bizarre, fit with Murray’s hypothesis. After being told that their partner treated them inconsiderately, participants with low self-esteem responded with increased confidence in their partner’s positive regard, and long-term commitment to their relationship. Moreover, learning that their partner treated them inconsiderately led to a small boost in their self-esteem. Like in the first study, Murray argued that the intervention mitigated the discrepancy between the participants’ self-views and their grandiose views of the partner. This made participants feel more confident that their partner wanted to be with them, and by extension, made them feel more confident in themselves.

Over the past few weeks I’ve presented you with interventions designed to boost self-esteem. Some have been successful. Others have failed. What have you learned across this series? Here are a few important take home points…
1.    Self-esteem is hard to change.
Although I presented a few interventions that have been successful, it is notoriously difficult to change self-esteem. Self-views evolve out of a lifetime of experience. A quick manipulation in a psychology study must be extremely well tuned to overcome a history of rejection or failure.

2.    No pie in the face.
Bombarding people with positive feedback in complete contradiction to self-views doesn’t seem to work. Telling someone to repeat “I am lovable” when they just don’t feel that way, not only failed to increase self-esteem, but actually reduced it in one lab study.

3.    Be real.
Interventions that provide more realistic, albeit still positive, feedback seems to work well. For example, telling participants with low self-esteem that they have a combination of both strengths and weaknesses that are desirable in a partner did boost self-esteem. It was believable and therefore beneficial.

4.    Be creative.
As the final Murray study showed us, changes in self-esteem are often counterintuitive. Making participants believe that their partner was inconsiderate actually boosted their self-esteem.  They stopped feeling so inferior to the partner, and that made them more secure in themselves. If you’re interested in self-esteem, and are attempting to design an intervention to improve it, try thinking outside the box.

Technorati Tags: Health, Interpersonal relationship, Mental Health, Positive psychology, Self Esteem, self help, The Ex (band), United States

Reprinted from: The Rainbow Project

The oppression and negativity shown by society towards gay and bisexual men affects the way we see ourselves and can cause a low or negative self-image and low self-esteem.

Low self-esteem can lead some men into:

• Exploitive relationships
• Risky sexual behaviour
• Alcohol and drug misuse
• Eating disorders/problems with food
• Body dissatisfaction- e.g. steroid abuse

How can you increase your self-esteem?

1. Stop comparing yourself with other people. There will always be people who have more than you and some who have less. If you play the comparison game, you’ll run into too many components you can’t defeat.

2. Stop putting yourself down. You can’t develop high self-esteem if you repeat negative phrases about yourself and your abilities. Whether speaking about your appearances, your career, your relationships, your financial situation, or any other aspects of your life, avoid self-deprecating comments.

3. Accept all compliments with “thank you.” Ever received a compliment and replied,”Oh, it was nothing.” When you reject a compliment, the message you give yourself is that you are not worthy of praise. Respond to all compliments with a simple “thank You.”

4. Use affirmations to enhance your self-esteem. On the back of a business card or small index cards, write out a statement such as “I like and accept my self.” or “I am valuable, lovable person and deserve the best in life” or even “I am proud to be gay/bisexual”. Carry the card with you. Repeat the statement several times during the day, especially at night before going to bed and after getting up in the morning. Whenever you say the affirmation, allow yourself to experience positive feelings about your statement.

5. Take advantage of workshops, books and CD programmes on self-esteem.Whatever material you allow to dominate your mind will eventually take root and affect your behaviour. If you watch negative television programmes or read newspaper reports of murders and business rip offs you will grow cynical and pessimistic. Similarly, if you read books or listen to programmes, that are positive in nature, you will take on these characteristics.

6. Associate with positive, supportive people. When you are surrounded by negative people who constantly put you and your ideas down, your self-esteem is lowered. On the other hand, when you are accepted and encouraged, you feel better about yourself in the best possible environment to raise your self-esteem. Visit our dropin and meet encouraging and supportive gay men and bisexual men.

7. Make a list of your past successes. This doesn’t necessarily have to consist of monumental accomplishments. It can include your “minor victories,” like learning to skate, passing an exam, receiving an award or promotion, getting the courage to visit a gay bar or gay support group, etc. Read this list often. While reviewing it, close your eyes and recreate the feelings of satisfaction and joy you experienced when you first attained each success.

8. Make a list of your positive qualities. Are you honest? Unselfish? Helpful? Creative? Be generous with yourself and write down at least 20 positive qualities. Again, it’s important to review this list often. Most people dwell on their inadequacies and then wonder why their life isn’t working out. Start focusing on your positive traits and you’ll stand a much better chance of achieving what you
wish to achieve.

9. Start giving more. I’m not talking about money. Rather, I mean that you must begin to give more of yourself to those around you. When you do things for others, you are making a positive contribution and you begin to feel more valuable, which, in turn, lifts your spirits and raises your own self-esteem.

10. Get involved in work and activities you love. It’s hard to feel good about yourself if your days are spent in work you despise. Self-esteem flourishes when you are engaged in work and activities that you enjoy and make you feel valuable. Even if you can’t explore alternative career options at the present time, you can still devote leisure time to hobbies and activities, which you find stimulating and enjoyable.

11. Be true to yourself. Live your own life – not the life others have decided is best for
you. You’ll never gain your own respect and feel good about yourself if you aren’t leading the life you want to lead. If you’re making decisions based on getting approval from friends and relatives, you aren’t being true to yourself and your self-esteem is lowered.

12. Take action! You won’t develop high self-esteem if you sit on the sidelines and back away from challenges. When you take action – regardless of the ensuing result – you feel better about yourself. When you fail to move forward because of fear and anxiety, you’ll be frustrated and unhappy – and you will undoubtedly deal a damaging blow to your self-esteem.

Technorati Tags: Health, Mental Health, Positive psychology, Rainbow Project, Self Esteem, self help, Substance Abuse, The Ex (band)

Reprinted from: Come Fill Your Cup

Editor’s Note: It’s been requested that we have a series on self-esteem and the Christian woman, and we have just the person for the job in Chelli Guthrie. Please enjoy and carefully consider this first lesson in our new series on Biblical self-esteem. Be sure to leave questions, concerns, encouragement, etc. in the comments section!

If you’ve been around children’s sports in the last ten or fifteen years, you might have noticed a strange trend, there is no score-keeping. Kids battle it out for an hour, but in the end there are no winners or losers. Everyone walks off the field or court “equal”. Or take the modern American classroom. Many schools have stopped using the traditional A-F grading scale. Instead, they give children a grade of “pass” or “fail”. That means the A student and the C student both get the same grade.

So why have we shielded our children from experiencing losing the game or getting a “C” in math?  Self-esteem. We don’t want our children to feel badly about themselves. In fact, that is how our society has defined it. Self-esteem is feeling good about yourself and what you can achieve. We read books about how to have it. We go to therapy or take medications if we don’t (I am not talking about clinical depression!). You would think in the richest, most free country in the world, we would have more self-esteem than anyone else in history. However, there has been a 400% increase in the use of anti-depressants from 1988-2008. In fact, 1 out of 10 Americans age 12 and older take them, and less than 1/3 of people on anti-depressants have actually seen a mental health professional in the last year (Harvard Health Letter, October 20, 2011).

While one could argue a lot of reasons for an increase in the use of anti-depressants, I believe our culture has defined self-esteem and the basis for it incorrectly. We need to change our definition to what God requires. God does not expect us to feel good about ourselves; He expects us to feel right about ourselves. Most of the time feeling right about ourselves should lead us to positive thoughts, but sometimes feeling right about ourselves should lead us to repentance. Our self-worth in God’s eyes should be the basis of our self-esteem as Christian women. Let’s compare worldly self-esteem to God’s view of self-esteem.

First, self-esteem should be exemplified by a consistency in thought. Notice I didn’t say a consistency in feeling. As humans, and women especially, our feelings are not a Biblical standard. In Jeremiah 17:9 it says, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”(ESV). The Hebrew word used for “heart” in this verse can mean our emotions and feelings. Something described as “deceitful” and “desperately sick” in God’s word is not something we want to heed in our lives! Feelings fluctuate from day to day, hour to hour, or even minute to minute. My husband is always amazed by our daughters’ ability to be extremely upset and sobbing one minute, then laughing and smiling the next!

If you listen to our culture, it tells you that how you feel about yourself is the most important part of self-esteem, but our feelings will carry our mind and attitudes from highs to lows and back again, day in and day out. We must train our thoughts to anchor our self-esteem so that it is not tossed about by feelings. This is not easy! It requires constant dedication and attention to our moods with Biblical thoughts to counteract feelings. Once you actually spend a day paying attention to the things you say to yourself in your mind, you might be shocked at how much your feelings hurl insults at your self-worth.

Second, self-esteem should be focused on others. There are two extremes when it comes to self-esteem, those with too much and those with too little. The first group is commonly known as narcissists. These are people who have excessive self-admiration. They are the best. Everything should be focused on them, their abilities, their lives, etc.  The second group has low self-esteem. They feel like they can do nothing right. When something goes wrong, it is always their fault. If only they had been prettier, a better mother, a better wife, a better whatever, then xyz wouldn’t have happened. As extreme as these views are, they have one thing in common. It’s all about me! Either I’m the focus because I’m so wonderful or I’m the focus because I’m so awful. Neither of these views is correct or godly.

I always say that God is a God of balance; extremes usually lead to sin. This idea is never truer than when it comes to self-esteem. When you have Biblical self-esteem, that confidence flows outward to others. Paul talks about this exact thought inPhilippians 2:3, when he writes, “Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves;” (NASB). You might find it odd to read a verse talking about humility of mind when self-esteem is the topic, but the two are completely intertwined. You cannot be humble or serve others if you are selfish. Having too much self-esteem or not enough self-esteem both lead to selfish behavior. Here is a short story to illustrate this point:

Mary is a narcissist. She doesn’t feel like she should have to do anything for the church unless she gets the starring role and lots of recognition. She is so good at so many things that she always wants to be in charge. She shouldn’t have to help clean up! She organized the entire event. Sandy, on the other hand, suffers from low self-esteem. She doesn’t want to help clean up either. Sandy is always asked to do menial jobs like cleaning up the fellowship hall. She knows it’s just because she doesn’t have any real talents. They always have the people without talent clean, so she does as little as she can. Why does she even come to these things? It just makes her feel bad about herself.  Louise has a Biblical view of self-esteem. She enjoys serving in whatever capacity she is asked. She doesn’t necessarily like cleaning, but she does like helping others and the Lord’s kingdom. She knows that she is defined by more than the job she is doing tonight, so she goes about cheerfully doing what needs to be done even if no one thanks her or even notices.

Do you see how extremes of self-esteem lead to a selfish heart and ultimately a “me” focused attitude? We have all known women that fall into each of the above categories. Maybe at times we have fallen into all three of those categories. I know I have! But we should find ourselves becoming more and more like Louise and less and less like Mary and Sandy.

Finally, as Christians our self-esteem should be found in the cross. This is where the world’s version of self-esteem is most incorrect. The world tells you self-esteem is found in externals, looks, children, intelligence, husband, marriage, home, job, etc.  But God tells us that our self-esteem is found in the cross and what it represents. If you want to think right about yourself, you have come to the correct place. The cross will tell you that you are worth more than anything else in God’s eyes. You are worth the life of His innocent Son. The cross will tell you that you are undeserving and a sinner, that you still have things to work on that God wants to perfect in you. You are not better than anyone else. You are not worse than anyone else. You are a Christian woman made to serve a God who wants you to realize that you are fabulous, wonderful, and purchased at a great price so that He can make you into what He wants you to be.

In the next two lessons, I will focus on this last point a lot more, and in the last lesson, I will examine our ultimate example of someone with perfect self-esteem, Jesus Christ. I pray that you might find these lessons encouraging and a radically different message than what you hear in our world.

Technorati Tags: Books, God, Health, Mental Health, Self Esteem, self help, Shopping, United States

Reprinted from: Having Time

Every person has a secret of success and I guess it has something to do with a profound belief in their own value and worth. By considering the concept of self-image everybody should know the basics on how to boost your self-esteem in 5 simple steps.

How to boost self-esteem in 5 steps:

1) Doesn’t metter how high or low your self-esteem can be right this second – just find a way to acknowledge  that you have at least something good to begin with! Self-esteem is crucially important. I understand, that you may be not a biggest fan of some actions and decisions you made in the past, but please, please, STOP thinking about those things you failed to do and FOCUS on things you did well. Be kind and grateful. And remember – there is NO ESCAPE from yourself and it’s better to have a good & strong inner peace. At least, try to put things in order in your head, but mostly in balance.

2) Self-esteem always depends on the confidence and consciousness of self-worth. Confidence should be an unshakable belief of the ability to be responsible for things happening around you in this unpredictable and fast moving world.

3) None of the views & opinions should be above ones you believe in (responsible for your growth and self-development). The most important talks, presentations and performances that may be taking place in your life – are in front of your own judgement.

4) Remember: no one looks at your believes or your person as critical as you do. STOP. Give yourself a break. As I told you before, be kind to yourself and practice it on a daily basis.

5) You can be your best friend or the worst enemy!I want you to understand this once and for all that the only person who is holding the keys to your happiness – is YOU! And remember, that you have the freedom to be yourself here and now.

Technorati Tags: Health, Mental Health, Personal Development, Philosophy, Self Esteem, self help, Self Improvement, Substance Abuse, The Ex (band), Wikipedia

Reprinted from: No More Whispers!

It is a brand new week good people and this means we will be handling a brand new topic. I have received a lot of feedback and i really thank you for that. Most of the people have asked for the discussion of image, self-confidence and self-esteem issues and that is exactly what we are going to pick up on this week. I hope that it will be an interesting learning experience.

Now to the basics;

“Self-esteem creates natural highs. Knowing that you’re lovable helps you to love more. Knowing that you’re important helps you to make a difference to to others. Knowing that you are capable empowers you to create more. Knowing that you’re valuable and that you have a special place in the universe is a serene spiritual joy in itself.”

What Is Self-Esteem?

Self-esteem is the value we place on what we believe to be true about ourselves; how we feel about ourselves; and/or an emotion we hold true about ourselves.

According to Wikipedia; Self-esteem is a term in psychology to reflect a person’s overall evaluation or appraisal of his or her own worth. Self-esteem encompasses beliefs (for example, “I am competent”, “I am worthy”) and emotions such as triumph, despair, pride and shame.

People with high self-esteem consider themselves worthy, and view themselves as equal to others. They recognize their limitations, expect to grow and improve, and do not pretend to be perfect.

Those low in self-esteem generally experience self-rejection, self-dissatisfaction, self-contempt, and self-disparagement. Low self-esteem can be a major factor in mental health problems, suicide, alcohol and drug abuse, violence, and many other problems.

Characteristics of a person with high or positive self-esteem

1. Believes strongly in certain principles and values.
2. Is capable of acting in his/her own best judgment.
3. Has fewer health problems.
4. Genuinely enjoys him/herself and participates in a wide variety of activities.
5. Feels equal to others as a person.
6. Resists efforts of peers to dominate or sway them.
7. Feels confident in the ability to deal with challenging situations, despite failures and setbacks
8. Is sensitive to the needs of others; cares about others.
9. Is more flexible and adaptable in changing situations.
10. Is happy, energetic, enthusiastic, and enjoys life.

Characteristics of a person with low or negative self-esteem

1. Is overly sensitive to criticism, and afraid to make a mistake.
2. Is overly critical of others and self.
3. Blames others.
4. Feels persecuted.
5. Has a fear of competition and/or is reluctant to try new things.
6. Is over-responsive to praise.
7. Is shy, timid, or withdrawn.
8. Is uncertain of own opinions and values.
9. May be jealous or possessive.
10. Has difficulty entering into loving relationships.

Tomorrow we will be discussing on some of the things we should do raise our self-esteem and therefore make us acceptable and productive in the society.

Technorati Tags: Child, Health, Mental Health, Self Esteem, self help, Substance Abuse, The Ex (band), Wikipedia

Reprinted from: Life 123

by: Lisa Bower, publisher in Life 123

Anger management tips are often simple little things you can do in your daily life. You don’t have to enroll in anger management courses to deal with such emotions, but it is wise to learn how to keep your cool.

Get Physical
A surefire way to deal with your anger is to do something physical. You can go for a run, take boxing lessons or take a bike ride. This way, you are taking a proactive stance when it comes to dealing with your anger.

Take Up a Hobby
Similarly, if you are upset, it pays to pick up a hobby. Try your hand at knitting, making model cars or even drawing whenever you are upset and it’ll take your mind off of what’s bothering you.

Breathe
Try deep breathing exercises when dealing with your anger. Take big breaths, making sure to breathe from your diaphragm or gut instead of your chest. Big breaths help your body to relieve stress and tension.

Mantra
Try repeating key phrases and words when you are angry. For example, try repeating such phases as “it’s going to be okay” or “I got this” to help you calm down.

Reach Out
When upset, try to call, email or write a friend or family member. Reaching out to your loved ones is a great way to receive the support you need.

Write It Out
Invest in a journal and write down how you are feeling. Self-exploration or reflection is a great way to figure out why you are feeling down and how to deal with this.

Plan
Make a plan when you are incredibly angry. Often, it helps to consider why you are angry and how you can fix or alter a situation.

Take a Break
If you’re angry, try to take a break from a situation or person. Taking some space will help you clear your head and give you some distance.

Laugh It Up
Use humor to deflect anger. This will take the edge off of your mood.

Make a Change
When you’re angry, it helps to make some serious life changes when upset. For example, you can do everything from change how you get to work to your job, daily routine and even your friend group.

Technorati Tags: anger, angermanagement, Charlie Sheen, Emotion, Health, men, People, Relationship

Reprinted from: About.om

By: Mike Hardacastle, Publisher in About.com

I get mad. You get mad. Your Mom gets mad. Your Dad gets mad. Hey, even God gets mad. Let’s face it, at one time or another EVERYBODY gets mad! Anger is a normal human emotion and it is the way that your subconscious mind releases mental and emotional pressure but sometimes this normal psychological function can run amok and lead you astray. Getting angry is normal, letting anger get the best of you is not. So how do you know if your anger is getting out of control and what can you do about it if you’re raging? Surprisingly enough recognizing and managing anger is relatively easy, here’s how!

Your anger is out of control if…

• you find yourself getting angry at everything that inconveniences you, annoys you or otherwise gets in the way of what you want to be doing,
• it leads you to act out aggressively or violently as in yelling, ranting, hitting, shoving or plotting revenge,
• it consumes you long after the event has passed, if you dwell on the things that make you angry then you’re in trouble because normal anger is only a temporary emotional response to unsettling eternal stimuli,
• things that didn’t used to make you angry are suddenly major issues worthy of a rant, this does not apply to times when you have suppressed normal anger only to times that anger really isn’t merited, for example when somebody gets a higher grade than you or when a person is taking too long in the bathroom,
• you find yourself doing self destructive things to cope with your angry feelings, such as reckless driving, hazardous recreational activities, physical fighting, drugs and alcohol or, unsafe or random sexual activity.

You can manage that anger by…

• recognizing the difference between an annoyance or inconvenience and a bona fide reason to get mad – somebody hurting you, hurting somebody you care for or damaging your property are all good reasons to get mad; somebody “disrespecting” you, getting in your way, slowing you down, being luckier than you, or doing something better than you do it are not reasonable causes of anger,
• taking a deep breath, stepping away from the situation and asking yourself “Why am I really mad?”, often people misdirect anger caused by a valid yet bigger issue on to everyday annoyances and inconveniences,
• know your triggers, if there are certain things that you know bother you or that you can’t accept know what they are, take steps to avoid them, and play out an appropriate reaction in your head when you’re feeling calm to train your mind to react that way when the problem arises in real life,
• plan your time wisely, one of the most common anger stressors is poor time management, when you’re in a rush and something slows you down even more you are very likely to react in anger, the simplest way to avoid this is to exercise effective time management,
• exercising regularly, it’s true that exercise is an excellent way to de-stress body and mind, people who exercise regularly are less likely to overreact to annoyances and inconveniences,
• talk it out, reacting in anger often causes the reasoning center of the brain to shut off for a time and the way you can turn it back on is to talk rather than act out when anger takes hold, it may sound crazy but taking a few minutes to gather your thoughts and speaking them out loud can do wonders to diffuse an angry situation.

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